Querencia - Essay Draft

Empire State of Mind

By Sharmaine Sebastian

I wait impatiently for my dad to pick me up from school. I sit under the palm tree unable to stick around the school for a little longer. Finally after 5 long minutes, I see the silver-gold car gleaming in the sunlight, taking the left turn to the front of the school. I hop into the car and laid my head back on the seat. “How was your day?” my dad asked. I replied, “Uhm, it was good.” We stopped talking after that. I couldn’t wait to get home.

My dad drove onto the driveway, and I begin to gaze at the white and maroon house. It still looked the same as it was when we recently bought it during December of 2008. The green palm trees and green bushes around our home gave it a woodsy and tropical appearance. I got out of the car right after it came to a stop. I thought to myself, “Yes. I’m finally home!”

As I walked into the living room downstairs, I saw my grandma sitting on the couch. I go over to her and hug her. I run up the stairs, passing by the old-looking kitchen. It really needs to be repaired. The stairs were old too. While walking up the stairs, I could hear the creaking of it. That felt very uncomfortable. I kept thinking that it would break.

I could see my cousin in the living room as I took the last step on the stairs. He was watching football like always. I drop my bags onto the floor and then he gave me the remote to change the channel, but I refused. I said, “Oh. It’s okay. I’m going to go to my room, and do my homework.” He didn’t respond. But I stayed in the living room for ten minutes though, so that I could relax for a while. I examined everything about the living room. The white paint was flawless. There were no chips in it. The room was kind of messy too. Papers and books were scattered across the coffee table. Most of them belonged to my cousin. He likes to read a lot.

I stare out the window. I took in the view of the mountains. I can see it clearly from where I was sitting. It would be about an hour before the sun goes down. “I better get started on my homework,” I said. “Okay,” said my cousin. I grabbed all of my books and bags and went to my room. I put the key into the gold door knob, turned it, and opened my door. The cool breeze hits my face every time I walk in. It always refreshes me and has the scent of my perfume, peach & honey.

I place my books onto my bed and bags onto the ceramic-tiled floor, took off my shoes, and I lay down, very exhausted. The light outside shined through the windows and brightens up my room. The pink blinds compliment the very white walls, which were covered in posters and pictures of my friends and me. I love decorating my room. It lets me express myself without limits. I sometimes draw my own pictures and post it up on my wall.

The flower print comforter and my hello kitty pillow make me feel like I’m still a little girl. (To be honest, I like that feeling) I examine it carefully, noticing the lace around the ends of the comforter. Then my closet caught my eye. My clothes were hung the way it’s supposed to, color coordinated and separated by category. Jackets were all the way at the beginning of my closet, and then it would be t-shirts, blouses, dresses, and jeans. The shelves above held my bags, shoes, and boxes of old clothes from when I was a baby. I laugh to myself thinking about those days. Then it reminded me of the old wardrobe I had ever since I was born. I saw it sitting in the far left corner of my room. The stickers I placed on it since I was 3 were still there, along with the many markings made of crayons, markers, and paint. (You won’t believe how many times I got scolded for doing all of that)

To the right of the wardrobe, was my dresser. My note books, hello kitty jewelry box, make-up, perfume, lotion, deodorant, facial cleansers, and other daily essentials were on top of it. It didn’t look organized, but it wasn’t messy either. I spot my stereo on the right corner of my eye. I decide to turn it on, putting in a CD of classical music from Mozart, Debussy, Beethoven, and Pachelbel. I heard Claire de Lune being played.

I have different personalities when I’m in my room, but I don’t have a personality disorder. I can be a nerd if I wanted to, just by reading a book or even organizing my book shelf. I could act like a musical genius, just by listening to classical music like I am right now. Or I can just be downright crazy when I play alternative music very loud that it would force my parents to pound on my door so hard and yell at me to turn it down a notch. I’ll admit that I can be very unusual.

After being distracted by everything around me, I started on my homework. It's 6:03 p.m. I have just completed all of my assignments. Now, there wasn’t anything else I wanted to do but chill and hang loose. I jump onto my bed, sprawl on my back, and cover my face with a pillow. I slowly fall into a trance and all of my worries, stress, and problems disappear. I’m in my own world now, my own empire, my own state of mind. There’s nothing that can bring me down, not even gravity. (If you know what I mean) This place brings out the true me and helps me to know more about who I really am. I feel so secure in my room because there’s no one that can judge me besides God.