Sunday, August 29, 2010
Coming of Age Essay Draft - Adapting to the New
I wake up to the sound of my annoying alarm and with the morning sun shining through my windows. But this is not just any ordinary morning. It is the morning of the first day of high school. I wonder what awaits me there.
I press the button to turn the alarm off and go back to sleep. "Five more minutes," I say to myself. But in truth, I am wide awake. My mother knocks on the door. Knock, knock, knock. "Hey, you! Get up or else you're gonna be late," says my mother. Wow. Some words of encouragement, huh? I'm in the state of panic and thats all my mom says. Now, I'm really nervous. Without complaint, I listen to her and fix my bed. I go to my closet. I regret myself for not picking out an outfit the night before when I had the chance. I wish public schools had uniforms like at my old school, that way I won't have to worry about what I'd be wearing. Uniforms made my morning routine easier. Without much thinking, I grab a simple purple t-shirt and a pair of dark blue skinny jeans. I don't want to overdress. I do the other things in my morning routine, take a shower, brush my teeth, dress up, fix my hair. Ta-Da! I'm ready for school. Or so I thought.
Driving up to the school campus of Moanalua High School, my stomach begins to sink and I start to feel sick. "Are you alright?", asks my dad. "Uhmm, I think so," I reply. "Oh, don't worry. You're going to do fine." "Yeah, sure," I say without an ounce of enthusiasm. My dad pulls up to the front of the school. The butterflies flutter in my stomach like crazy. "Well, have a good day. Okay?" Those are the last words I hear from my father as I step out of the car. I nod my head meekly as I close the door. I turn around, walk up the stairs, and look at all these kids with their big group of friends. So far, I only have two friends attending here with me. But for now, I'm alone. I'm by myself. I have no one. All these negative ideas flow in to my head as if my head were a magnet for negative energy. I try to put on a brave face and look as if I know where I'm going. I call Janelle to see where she was and ask where we would meet.
We meet in front of G building. Janelle with three other girls, whose names I later find out are Czarina, Brittany, and Isabelle, walk toward me. Janelle and I greet each other with a hug. We, the clueless freshmen, don't know what to do besides just stand there and look idiotic. We decide to head up to G201 and wait till the bell rings. I open the door and an upperclassman is there. "Psh, freshmen," he says with a little snicker. Ouch! My first put-down of the year and on the first day too. Can't this day get any better? I hope and pray it would.
The first bell rings. "This is not elementary or middle school anymore. This is the start of my high school career. Time to change and grow up. Here I go," I think to myself as I try to pep myself up. My homeroom teacher, Mrs. Sueoka, starts with an opening statement to welcome us, the freshmen. Just the word "freshman" scares me. I feel like a target for bad things to happen. Watching all those TV shows where teens get beat up, teased, and bullied in high school makes me think of this place as a torture chamber. I know those shows are stereotypical, but just knowing the possibilities of those things happening to me couldn't escape my mind. My teacher's voice interrupts my thoughts telling us to go to the football field for an assembly.
The day drags on. The teachers go through motions of introducing the course. The same old thing every first day. Nothing compelling ever catches my attention today. However, when lunch time arrives, a rush of panic swells over me. I don't know what to do. I try to contact Shannel, but she does not answer her cell. "Oh my gosh. I'm going to eat lunch by myself," I say. Suddenly, I picture an image myself sitting in a bathroom stall eating my lunch all alone pathetically like on those TV shows. I shake out the thought quickly. I don't want to be labelled as a loner. I don't know where my obsession with status came from. I didn't care about that kind of stuff before, but I guess this is what high school does to you. Then luckily, I happen to spot Traci standing in the lunch line. I go next to her and use this time to make a new friend. Turns out Traci is alone too. We both win! Yay!
I find relief after lunch due to the fact that the day was almost over. The good thing is that nothing embarrassing has happened to me…YET! I really look forward to that final bell ringing. And it wouldn't be long until it did. Riiiiiing! There goes the bell. The end of the first day of my high school career. Not as bad as I thought.
By the end of the day, I have a new outlook on high school. It's not the torture chamber I thought it was. I figure out that high school is place where I will find myself and what I want to do with myself in the future. When I found out that some people were in the same situation as me, not knowing what to do or who to hang out with, I didn't feel alone or anxious anymore. Instead, I felt more confident and at ease. This is not elementary school nor middle school anymore. This is where it counts the most. I now know that here I'll be able to attain more knowledge, confidence, and friendships. I now know that here I'll be able to experience more independence, responsibilities, and opportunities. And now, there's nothing that can hinder me from accomplishing the things I want to accomplish.
I press the button to turn the alarm off and go back to sleep. "Five more minutes," I say to myself. But in truth, I am wide awake. My mother knocks on the door. Knock, knock, knock. "Hey, you! Get up or else you're gonna be late," says my mother. Wow. Some words of encouragement, huh? I'm in the state of panic and thats all my mom says. Now, I'm really nervous. Without complaint, I listen to her and fix my bed. I go to my closet. I regret myself for not picking out an outfit the night before when I had the chance. I wish public schools had uniforms like at my old school, that way I won't have to worry about what I'd be wearing. Uniforms made my morning routine easier. Without much thinking, I grab a simple purple t-shirt and a pair of dark blue skinny jeans. I don't want to overdress. I do the other things in my morning routine, take a shower, brush my teeth, dress up, fix my hair. Ta-Da! I'm ready for school. Or so I thought.
Driving up to the school campus of Moanalua High School, my stomach begins to sink and I start to feel sick. "Are you alright?", asks my dad. "Uhmm, I think so," I reply. "Oh, don't worry. You're going to do fine." "Yeah, sure," I say without an ounce of enthusiasm. My dad pulls up to the front of the school. The butterflies flutter in my stomach like crazy. "Well, have a good day. Okay?" Those are the last words I hear from my father as I step out of the car. I nod my head meekly as I close the door. I turn around, walk up the stairs, and look at all these kids with their big group of friends. So far, I only have two friends attending here with me. But for now, I'm alone. I'm by myself. I have no one. All these negative ideas flow in to my head as if my head were a magnet for negative energy. I try to put on a brave face and look as if I know where I'm going. I call Janelle to see where she was and ask where we would meet.
We meet in front of G building. Janelle with three other girls, whose names I later find out are Czarina, Brittany, and Isabelle, walk toward me. Janelle and I greet each other with a hug. We, the clueless freshmen, don't know what to do besides just stand there and look idiotic. We decide to head up to G201 and wait till the bell rings. I open the door and an upperclassman is there. "Psh, freshmen," he says with a little snicker. Ouch! My first put-down of the year and on the first day too. Can't this day get any better? I hope and pray it would.
The first bell rings. "This is not elementary or middle school anymore. This is the start of my high school career. Time to change and grow up. Here I go," I think to myself as I try to pep myself up. My homeroom teacher, Mrs. Sueoka, starts with an opening statement to welcome us, the freshmen. Just the word "freshman" scares me. I feel like a target for bad things to happen. Watching all those TV shows where teens get beat up, teased, and bullied in high school makes me think of this place as a torture chamber. I know those shows are stereotypical, but just knowing the possibilities of those things happening to me couldn't escape my mind. My teacher's voice interrupts my thoughts telling us to go to the football field for an assembly.
The day drags on. The teachers go through motions of introducing the course. The same old thing every first day. Nothing compelling ever catches my attention today. However, when lunch time arrives, a rush of panic swells over me. I don't know what to do. I try to contact Shannel, but she does not answer her cell. "Oh my gosh. I'm going to eat lunch by myself," I say. Suddenly, I picture an image myself sitting in a bathroom stall eating my lunch all alone pathetically like on those TV shows. I shake out the thought quickly. I don't want to be labelled as a loner. I don't know where my obsession with status came from. I didn't care about that kind of stuff before, but I guess this is what high school does to you. Then luckily, I happen to spot Traci standing in the lunch line. I go next to her and use this time to make a new friend. Turns out Traci is alone too. We both win! Yay!
I find relief after lunch due to the fact that the day was almost over. The good thing is that nothing embarrassing has happened to me…YET! I really look forward to that final bell ringing. And it wouldn't be long until it did. Riiiiiing! There goes the bell. The end of the first day of my high school career. Not as bad as I thought.
By the end of the day, I have a new outlook on high school. It's not the torture chamber I thought it was. I figure out that high school is place where I will find myself and what I want to do with myself in the future. When I found out that some people were in the same situation as me, not knowing what to do or who to hang out with, I didn't feel alone or anxious anymore. Instead, I felt more confident and at ease. This is not elementary school nor middle school anymore. This is where it counts the most. I now know that here I'll be able to attain more knowledge, confidence, and friendships. I now know that here I'll be able to experience more independence, responsibilities, and opportunities. And now, there's nothing that can hinder me from accomplishing the things I want to accomplish.
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